Out of all the lies I’ve told, “Just Kidding ;)” is my favorite.
If thought bubbles appeared above my head, I’d be so screwed.
Let’s work it out.
Cause honestly, you’re just one bad breakup away from owning 41 cats.
There’s no right way to eat a Rhesus.
I hope you’ve nearly recovered from your annual New Year’s Day trip to the Gym.
The first step to recovery is admitting that the other person is the problem.
Regular naps help prevent old age. Especially if you take them while driving.
Honesty is the best policy. Unless you want people to like you.
Next time your friend falls asleep at your house; set off the fire alarm and yell, “FIRE!”
If I had a tail, it would wag everytime you walk in the door.