You only need six things to get a girl; they’re called abs.
Life was a lot easier when I thought girls had cooties.
I don’t always check out hot chicks. But when I do, my girlfriend catches me.
Awesome women have curves and tattoos.
I don’t always meet a nice girl, but when I do, I meet her boyfriend 2 minutes later.
I want to be friends with girls, but they are all just so stupid.
The “curvy” girl on the dating site was just fat.
I’ve got 99 problems, women are all of them.
Wow! She looks really good in those jeggings. Said no one, ever.
Colored skinny jeans look cute on everyone but me.