Oh, I’m a few minutes late to class, please stare me down like I just killed 10 people.
Tell me more about how it’s so hard being a broke college student. The blues must sound so good through your $300 headphones.
Oh, you’re in high school and already engaged? Please tell me more about how this will last forever.
Oh, you drink diet soda? Tell me more about how healthy you are.
Oh, you have a hangover? Please tell me more about how you’re never going to drink again.
Oh, you’re flipping off the camera in your profile picture. Tell me more about how hardcore you are.
Oh you’re in a hurry? Please tell me how tailgating me will get you there faster.
Oh, you double check your car door is locked? Please tell me more about how you have OCD.
Oh, you have a new boyfriend? Please post every 15 minutes about how much you love him.