Aww…I’m sorry buddy

What do you mean I’m not a bear I have all the koalifications

I hate surprises.

I have a surprise for you…it’s poop.

I Don’t Always Tip

I don’t always tip, but when I do, I make sure they see me before dropping it into the jar.

Jepsen Rae Carly

Hey, I’m Dyslexic, and this is number, but here’s my maybe, so call me crazy.

There’s No One Home

I don’t always forget my keys. But when I do, there’s no one home.

I Beat My Wife and Kids

I beat my wife and kids everytime we play monopoly.