Muffin Tops!

Girl this ain’t no bakery so put that muffin top away!

Kill It!!

I don’t care how small that spider is, I want it dead.

Ewwww Who’s Gum Is That?

That awkward moment when you accidentally touch a piece of gum under your desk.

Your Mom Does What?

That awkward moment when your mom is a sex therapist.

I Hold My Farts For You

I would hold in my farts for you.

1 Ply Doesn’t Cut It

Life is too short to use one ply toilet paper.

Got First Pubic Hair

Gets first pubic hair, on his pizza.

That’s not Dating, That’s Babysitting

If he is 21 and you are 15. That’s not dating, that’s babysitting.

Kill It, Kill It!

Opens a window to get fresh air, spiders.

Same Clothes

I’ve worn the same clothes 3 days in a row and nobody’s noticed.