Don’t you type at me in that tone of voice.


Out of all the lies I’ve told, “Just Kidding ;)” is my favorite.

You thinking what I’m thinking?

If thought bubbles appeared above my head, I’d be so screwed.

Dear Harold…

The best nicknames are usually the ones that people don’t know they have.

Here kitty kitty

Let’s work it out.
Cause honestly, you’re just one bad breakup away from owning 41 cats.

Feel the burn

I hope you’ve nearly recovered from your annual New Year’s Day trip to the Gym.

Don’t Think Too Hard

Over-thinking is one of the top causes of depression.

Do you Computer?

Do you computer? I’m not great at computering but my grandson is teaching me how to computer.

The Bard’s Got Swagger

Shakespeare invented the word “swagger.”

Is The World Gonna End Yet?

Since the Mayan calendar did not include leap years, the world should have ended about 13 months ago.