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Better Take It Easy On That Text

Texting Crush, waits 3 minutes between texts to not seem desperate.

Bless You or Excuse You?

Tried to hold in sneeze during class, Farts.

Finally I’m Away From Her!

Leave crushes house, fart the entire way home.

Oh Those Are Nice Pictures

Crush shows you pictures on their Facebook, pretend like you’ve never seen them before.

What Was Your Name Again?

Has terrific memory, pretends to forget someones name to not seem like a stalker.

Leave Me Alone To Be Lonely

Wants human interaction when alone, wants to be left alone when around people.

I Wanna Meet Someone Special

Wants to meet someone special, who also dislikes meeting new people.

Oh No I Bought This Here

Goes to a store wearing something bought there, nervous they’ll think he’s stealing it.

Ooooo I Don’t Know Them

Friend starts talking to someone you don’t know, stand there in silence.

What Kind of Bread?

Subway Girl: “What kind of bread?” Me: “Yes, Please.”