America…where we show how thankful we are on Thanksgiving by running over people just to get a few deals at Best Buy.
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Why does waldo wear stripes? He doesn’t want to be spotted.
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You know you’re getting old when the only club you visit now is Sam’s Club.
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OMG! Insomnia! Goes to bed at 2am wakes up at Noon.
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Facebook says you are interested in women? You should only be interested in me!
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Someone brings baby to house, Googles “how to interact with babies.”
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Films Bigfoot, accidentally tapes over footage.
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Giving someone a card with no money inside it should be a crime.
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Walk in a straight line?! But I can’t even crawl yet officer.
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Meets girl on the internet, not a girl.
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